XXVII. If I could slow it all down

Life has slowed to a pace not known by most for many years, if ever. We all seem to be a bit frozen in time…waiting. Waiting for what? Waiting for the hectic and chaotic world to once again sprint forward while life fly’s by in a blur. The pain, suffering and loss of loved ones is tragic but is our forced respite so tragic? What are we discovering about life in this unfamiliar environment we find ourselves?

The Neighborhood

We have always appreciated our neighborhood and neighbors. We do even more so today. As a community we have come together and acted in a way that is reminiscent of bygone years. We are checking in on the elderly and home bound to make sure their needs are safely met. People are sharing resources. Residents are offering up extra eggs, offering to pickup items when they do need to venture out, offering a supportive ear. We are all connected thru the social platform, Nextdoor. Our neighborhood is very walk-able. Where as we use to see a loan adult with ear buds in, in their own world, we now have entire families venturing out, talking and laughing. People and families we have seen for years and only spoke to in passing, now stop for a visit. Its as if we all crave the company of people once we get away from some of the distractions that over-occupy our attention. The sidewalk chalk art is everywhere. Inspirational, creative and humorous. There are cutouts in the windows of homes, set there to entertain children passing by. What we know from history is tragedy brings out the best in us. We rise to the occasion when we are called upon to do so.

At Home

Our daughter was staying with us for the duration of the shelter in place order. She only lives about a half a mile form us, only moved out about 7 months ago but we had already adjusted to being empty-nesters. It was another adjustment to have her back in the home. When she lived at home is was part of our routine to always set down together as a family for the evening meal. I love that we are doing that again…even having fallen back into the routine of arguing with her about doing the dishes. After about a week of this, Lane stood in the kitchen doorway after dinner one evening and informed her that if she was going to continue pushing her feet under his dinning room table, she was going to contribute to the endeavor. Its all in good fun and guess what? She just gets up and starts helping with the dishes again. This is another secret guilty pleasure of mine…listening from the living room, to the two of them in the kitchen, laughing, sharing…its always been a bonding time for her and Lane. They talk about everything…some things I am grateful not to have to talk about with my daughter..;) He’s a great dad and “man-mom” (a phrase we coined shortly after her arrival in our lives) Lane has been working form home since early March. He has no problem filling his time. We had been following this unfolding event since December and began preparing in February. Lane keeps a well stocked pantry at all times so stocking up just meant adding a bit to what we already had on hand. We didn’t grow up in the great depression or WWII but we grew up hearing the first hand accounts of “lack” from our parents and grandparents. We always seem to be prepared for the possibility of a disruption to our routine but rarely think about it. We went as far as to gather building supplies for home renovation projects should we all be confined for an extend period of time. I can entertain myself with a sheet of plywood for days…although Lane has been pretty adamant about me not using saws and shop tools…do we really need to rush to an already over crowded emergency room to reattach my finger? 😉 Some items are hard to find but many can be made at home. I have walked into the house, on a number of occasions, greeted by the aroma of freshly baked bread or a batch of cookies. Its spring so Lane has a great deal of gardening to do as well. I am part of an essential team working in the healthcare field so I am still gong to work 4 days a week. Lane, an accomplished seamster has been making cloth masks for us to wear when we need to be out and about. We have been truly enjoying each others company. I wouldn’t have wanted to be quarantined with anyone else. I’ve been reminded , once again, why I fell in love with him decades ago.

A dear friends daughter graduated High School this spring. No graduation has been “normal’ but we are all making do and adjusting. Families are doing their best to mark the significance of these moments in young peoples lives. She asked if Lane could possibly make her a personalized face mask she could wear when she marched in the commencement ceremony. He made two, one for her daughter and one for her.

My niece graduated from UNO with a B.S. in biological (4.0). Her family made it a graduation to remember. Her mom organized a drive by graduation party. A lot of people participated. My niece, Ashley, made thank you bags she tossed from the side of the road. My bother and nephew surprised her with a new vehicle in the midst of the procession of well wishers. I love this family, my family, so much!!! I believe she will cherish these memories longer than those of having walked a stage with hundreds of others.

We are an incredibly adaptive species. Current conditions are forcing…offering the opportunity for us to reconnect. Getting to know each other once again, sharing meals and maybe noting what is truly important in life and how we can sometimes loose track of that in the day to day grind. The day to day grind has ground to a halt and we are keenly aware of the present and being present in it. I hope some of these current situations borne out of necessity remain after our return to “normal”. I hope families sitting down together, spending time together, working within our communities, together is part of the new normal.

I began writing this entry sometime ago…and then time just kind of stood still and so did I for awhile, Today the pace of life is quickening once again.

I have decided to end this entry with a musical selection that means a great deal to me, even more so today given the circumstances we find ourselves in. I have offered it up before, the original performance, but today, an incredible remake as a tribute to the composers passing. Neil Peart’s lyrics have a depth that I truly appreciate. There is introspection and hope in this song. I believe many of us are in this place, at this time, separate but together. Time is standing still and its giving us a moment to reassess what is important to each of us.