32. Christmas Memories 76′

Its a small community, population 273. A tavern, a Bank, a library, dry-goods and grocer, farm machinery and the grain elevator along with numerous churches. School classrooms were like a home away from home. School and Church were the center of our social world so as soon as I could, I started going to the church some of my classmates attended. The Federation Church, good ole basic Christianity. Simple and genuine. I felt welcomed and at ease as did my mom, brothers and sister.

School and church were the center of Christmas as well. Secular and non secular coexisted and the line between the two was never an issue. Teachers went to great lengths to decorate our classrooms and created a festival type atmosphere from the day after Thanksgiving break until the beginning of the Christmas break. Each class had a Christmas tree, a Nativity, a wreath and many other decorations. We all made a gift for our parents (Arts & Crafts). We wrote and mailed Christmas cards (English Class) We leaned about other traditions, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, (Social Studies / History class) We calculated, given the population of the world, how many houses Santa would have to visit every hour to achieve his goal on Christmas eve. (Math class)

Our church youth group was very active this time of year. We made bubble bread in the church basement to sell and to give as gifts for the less fortunate. Although our family would have certainly been considered one of those less fortunate, we were never made to feel so in this community. No one was. Those that were very fortunate went out of their way to never appear so, always working behind the scenes to assist those in need. We were on the receiving end of their generosity more than once.

Sidebar: I shared this memory with my husband shortly before our first Christmas together. On Christmas morning I could smell a familiar odor wafting thru our home. He went out and found the recipe and made my childhood memory real again. I’m crying as I write this. It marked the beginning of making happy Christmas memories that I had not allowed in decades. It has been our family tradition now for 20 years…early Christmas morning, hot chocolate and bubble bread to fuel the Christmas present opening extravaganza!

Our group went to the local nursing home, sang for the residents and then there was the caroling around town. This is an event. Mostly for the elderly but for families too. Anyone could sign up for a spot on our tour. This is Kansas in the winter. We are trudging thru deep snow. The snow, oh how I miss the moonlights refection off the mounds and blankets of snow. It had a damping effect. Like the world was in a jar of cotton balls. Its not as cold as people might think. It insulates and frankly we were bundled up like arctic explorers. At each stop we were greeted with smiles and applause. Upon completion of our set, we were all invited in for warm beverages and Christmas treats to sustain us. The audience was always appreciative and it made us all feel a bit like Santa Claus bringing some Christmas cheer to each and every one of them.

Each year our Sunday school group would bring to life the story of the Nativity at Christmas Eve services. All ages participated. I can still feel the comfort and calm of those moments, in the packed sanctuary, as the choir and congregation sang Christmas hymns by candle light. A world that was not always kind fades into the background and that which is kind shines with a brightness that fills me with hope and the promise of what Christmas truly means. I am so blessed to be siting here, a half century later, still feeling that surge of spirit from within. I miss that. I always have and always will.

We were invited to the bankers house one year for a little Christmas party. There was to be a “White Elephant” Christmas gift exchange. Dread swept over me. We couldn’t afford gifts for others not to mention, ‘where do I get a white elephant” ? I had never heard of this before but mom quickly explained it to me and found an item laying around the house for me to wrap so I could attend. They served us chilli, burgers and hot dogs. Having established my self as the jokester among our group, I started this gag of putting pickles in my chilli…turns out, it is delicious! Don’t know if anyone else had been doing it before that but I have ever since.

At home, Christmas was somewhat of a mixed bag. Mom was our Santa..Christmas Angle incarnate. It doesn’t take much money to to be or bring the spirit of Christmas into the world. In fact, having less actually made it easier as our expectations are little to none and so we are surprised and fulfilled by the smallest gestures that may have gone unnoticed in the hustle and bustle of the season. We strung popcorn and made construction paper chains to decorate our tree. A tree that was bought just a few days before Christmas, at a discounted price as it was a leftover. It did not matter to us. Once we dressed it in our finest holiday attire, one string of 12 colored bulbs, our homemade garland of popcorn and paper, a half a dozen glass ornaments, a box of tinsel, each strand strategically placed upon its branches… it was just as awe inspiring as the tree in Rockefeller Plaza.

By Christmas eve the tree was sticking out of a large pile of colorful wrapping paper. Most of the gifts were very practical and things we needed. If there were just three gifts for each kid, that translated into 18 gifts at a minimum. It was a sight to behold and we would lay on the floor imagining that our package contained our hearts desire. One of the many toys we dreamed about as we thumbed thru the holly grail of Christmas…the Sear’s & Montgomery Ward Christmas catalogs. It was free to dream and dream we did. We had one Time Life Christmas album we played over and over. We opened everything under the tree on Christmas eve so there would be room for the one big gift we each got from Santa later that night. These gifts were not wrapped, Santa doesn’t have time to wrap all those gifts. We had already determined, in math class, that his schedule was tight…lol

One of my favorite Christmas programs, other than A Charlie Brown Christmas, Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer, Santa Claus is Coming to Town..OK, to many to list along with all the Christmas specials, was The Little Drummer Boy. I related to his plight of having no physical offering benefiting the new born king. I got the message. Mom was living the message. The best and most heartfelt gifts have no worldly value. They simply come forth from a place of gratitude. The only agenda is lightening others hearts, for a moment, with the greatest gift we can give. Ourselves.

I knew our funds were severely limited this Christmas. This was probably the most financially distressed Christmas we ever had… and the most memorable and satisfying as well. The following Christmas would be the most abundant we ever had…but one of the saddest. By Christmas this year, Harley had somewhat abandoned us physically and financially. He was a cross country semi driver and spent most of his time away from home. I considered the fact that he would not be home this year as an unexpected gift and at the same time feeling for the position my mom was in trying to give her family a Christmas and literally keeping the gas and lights on. The phone has already been shut off. Mom knew she could count on me to put the very brightest spin on the situation and I did.

It was one of the best Christmas mornings. Even though there were only two gifts under the tree, our house…home was filled with laughter and joy. Nerf cars, one for the boys and one for the girls. We played with them all day long, ate the popcorn garland, romped in the snow till we were frozen thru then back inside for more of mom’s hot chocolate and Christmas cookies.. Another hard candy Christmas where the best gift was our love for each other and time spent together.

In my heart and memories I am surrounded by my siblings, our mom and a home sustained by love. On my adult Christmas wish list this year is the chance to sail over the days of old, beyond the shadows of the past, to stand in the corner of our living room in that big old cold house and observe, appreciate and make real once again that which can never be outside of reflection…I am there now.

I will endeavor to keep the spirit of Christmas, the love I knew then and now, the simplicity of just enjoying the company of others and good tidings to all, all year long. Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas from our home to yours.

“God bless us, every one”